was talking to my gf about my fear of dying young for being trans and my mom putting my deadname on my gravestone, and she said “i hope that never happens, but if it does, i will carve your name into your grave myself if i have to.” and i think theres something extremely raw about that sentiment and trans community in general. you can kill only our bodies, but you cant kill transsexuality
You are the first ever completely ethical vampire: you post the terms and conditions of trespassing, make it clear in the memo that said people are subject to be fed on… You can safely say that humanity’s stupidity has kept you alive for thousands of years.
“Die, monster! You don’t belong in this world!”
“Ah, another hunter. Did you do your research?”
“Of course! I know all your weaknesses! Sunlight, and crosses, and–”
“No, I mean, have you done your due diligence?”
“… Come again?”
“Did you get a warrant before breaking into my house? You’re trespassing, you know.”
“Of course I am! I’m here to kill you!”
“Why?”
“Because you’re a vampire! You kill people!”
“I have yet to be found guilty in a court of law.”
“You… What?”
“I’ve been put on trial for every one of my killings, and each and every time I’ve been cleared of all charges.”
“How?!”
“You see, you humans have what is called the Castle Doctrine. I was a bit confused at first, since it doesn’t involve any actual castles, but after reading a few books…”
“The Castle Doctrine? But then…”
“Yes. As I told you before, you are trespassing.”
“Wait! I didn’t mean to– is that a shotgun??”
“Did you think I was still relying only on old magicks? Fool! But enough talk! Have at you!”
This one is pissing me off because there’s cheese in it. I’m not sure there’s a period of Chinese dynastic history wherein the type of dudes likely to be having rap battles would also have been familiar with hard cheese. There’d be political fucking implications to that. Fermented dairy products were often seen as uncivilized foods, and were associated in particular with northern “barbarian” cuisine (see: <lactose intolerance in Eurasia>), whereas competitive poetry was viewed as a civilized and scholarly pastime appropriate to civil servants and courtiers. Mentioning cheese in a verse which also references the heavens could be seen as an effort to legitimize the presence of these dangerous foreign elements within Chinese society, and, thus, as seditious. If dairy were to become a common theme in rap battles, it might be viewed as a dangerous sign of poor morale and defeatist thinking among the literati. “Emperor, we have got to move the capital to the south. The scholars are rapping about cheese. It’s all falling apart.”
‘germanic warrior with helmet’ - osmar schindler (1902)
The second best thing about erotic art is seeing people reject their initial reaction to it. The comments are full of people saying “oh my first thought was,” and, yeah, your first thought was right. The barbarian youth is sexually dominating the old Roman order. If you actually could get your mind out of the gutter you’d be the first animal to ever do so.
Had a dream I was gaming so hard during a run of Deltarune that I somehow unlocked all the unreleased chapters even the ones that haven’t been made yet and I pulverized through every single enemy just by running into them really fast, making them violently explode into scattered pixels with my sheer force. I was having fun until suddenly the screen went white and a very visibly upset Mario appeared (because I was playing on the switch) and he was sitting on a folding chair with his hands clasped together and he asked me “what the fuck is a-wrong with you”. immediately woke up
